no bolts… just a screw and a few nuts

by Bella Rum

First the Screw

I haven’t had much to say for a while. It was not my intention to take a break, but one day led to another, and a little off-line time turned into a few weeks of real-life time. I’ve divided my time between walking, reading, yoga-ing, and nursing.

H finally got his implant yesterday. Between the nose surgery and the implant, the poor guy has had quite a bit of head trauma. I could show you a photo of him with his icepack strapped to his head, but I’ll spare you the discomfort and him the humiliation. This is a photo of his implant. It doesn’t include the crown. He will get that after a few months and after the bone has grown around that impressive  screw. As you can see, it’s one of the uppers.

He really didn’t have a bad time of it. He slept through the entire thing because they knocked him out, something I’ve offered to do a million times. He slept the entire day and only managed to mumble a few ridiculous things. As we were leaving, he asked the dental assistant if he could have wine when he got home. It was 10:00 am. She suggested forgoing alcoholic beverages until the effects of the sedative subsided. I assured her that he was not in the habit of drinking wine at 10:00 am. He usually waits until at least 11:00.

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The Nuts

Do you remember when God contacted that woman through her stove or toaster oven? Or was it aliens? They wouldn’t leave her alone. Do you have any idea how annoying that is?

Besides all the  reading, walking, nursing, and yoga-ing, a great deal of my time has been spent answering my phone. Between 3:00 pm and 4:00 pm, my phone rings almost everyday. If my phone is ringing off the hook it must be an election year.

Are you a red, blue or purple state?

Why are they pursuing me? If it isn’t for my sultry beauty, it must be my opinion. Yep. It’s my opinion. Why? Because we’ve become a purple state. Voters in battleground states are deluged with calls from pollsters, research companies, political parties, candidates, etc. Virginia may have gone to the Democrats in 2008, but that was the first time since Lyndon Johnson in 1964, and it was very close. Once upon a time it was one of the most reliable red states in the union, all that has changed. We’re almost 50/50 around here now. We make like Tarzan now and swing with the greatest of ease, and that suddenly makes our opinions very important during election years.

As I answered the phone yesterday, I told H, “It’s probably one of those political research companies.” I think the caller heard me; even still, it was a quirky conversation.

Me ~ Hello

Research Person ~ I want you to know that I don’t know who you are.

Me ~ Excuse me.

RP ~ You’re completely anonymous. I only want to ask you a few questions. We’d really appreciate your cooperation, and your answers will remain confidential.

Me ~ Did you say you don’t know who I am?

RP ~ That’s right. I only have your phone number.

I guess he hasn’t heard of reverse look-up?

Interesting that he wanted me to know he didn’t know who I was, because I didn’t know who he was either. They never identify who they’re working for. I guess anonymity goes both ways.

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