lingering holiday syndrome

by Bella Rum


IMG_1315It’s surprising that I can find anything to write here. Life has been mundane lately, but that’s okay. I’m not complaining. It’s better than the craziness of the past couple of months. I’m still sequestering myself from that flu/virus drenched world out there. H went to Walmart a few days ago during their busiest hours, and it was deserted. He couldn’t believe it. Our state has been hit hard with this epidemic.. as I know others have, too.

I spend my time reading and eating and watching old movies. Notice how I slyly slipped “eating” in the middle of my short list of activities, but I don’t fool myself. I know you’re much to clever to miss it. I cannot stop eating. I’ve never experienced such a compulsion to eat… ANYTHING… that doesn’t run from me. I blame it on the steroids. No wonder those athletes bulk up overnight.

AND…

My face is the size of a pie plate – not from eating but rather the effects of the steroids. I’m trying to be nice to myself and not say jack-o’-lantern, but it is somewhat distorted. Hopefully this will subside soon. I’m almost at the end of the prescription. The weight gain will not subside soon unless I modify my eating habits and start moving a little more. All in due time, but it’s very frustrating. You know I’m feeling better because I’m whining and not even attempting to twist it into something that pretends to offer soaring insights.

Christmas decorations are still strewn here and there in various rooms and in various stages of readiness for the attic. A long, light-wrapped garland is still lying on the front porch, the wreath is still hanging on the door and our guard dog remains beribboned with holly in his basket. Do I care? That would be a NO. I hope to eradicate all signs of Christmas before Easter. That’s my goal, not a lofty one, but that’s how we roll around here these days. IMG_1293

Slow improvement is tedious, but I’ll take it over relapsing any day. Slow improvement = good. Relapsing = bad. Now that’s insight.

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