Acorn: The Truth Revealed
by Bella Rum
We booked it over to the dump this morning with a dozen more bags of yard waste. If I could sell gum balls for a penny a piece, I’d be rich. Did I ever tell you that acorn story? I checked my archives and can’t find it, but I may have mentioned it in a comment somewhere. It’s one of those ‘my friend has this friend’ kind of stories.
So, my friend has this friend who pledged a thousand dollars to a charity. Then she had to come up with a way to make the money because she didn’t have or didn’t want to take money from her own account. When she looked around to see what she had to sell, she realized she had a surplus of acorns. Bazillions of acorns. Acorns out the wazoo! Acorns here, there and everywhere.
She wondered, would anyone pay for these? She opened an account with eBay and found buyers. Who would want acorns, you ask? Pigs! Pigs love acorns. As it turns out, some of the most expensive pork comes from acorn-fed pigs. See there. See how that works out for the charity-giving friend of my friend. With all the hungry pigs in the world, who was she to keep all her acorns to herself? In the end, she was happy, the charity was happy, and the pigs were happy. And acorns are environmentally sustainable. Win/Win/Win!
The food that a pig eats greatly affects the subsequent taste of its fat and meat. Some of the most expensive pork and ham come from pigs fed on acorns. The high tannin levels in the acorns are believed to lead to the unique taste of Iberico ham, said to be as complex as a mature wine. Acorns are also a good source of fiber, complex carbohydrates, vitamins and minerals. Pigs love acorns!
So there’s the acorn story.
H dropped me off after the dump trip, and took his little truck to get mulch. His brother (80) – 13 years older than H – works a couple of days a week at the mulch place. I tell H that working in your old age keeps you healthy. He says that sleeping late and getting lots of sex with a younger woman (presumably me) keeps him healthy.
I don’t know how I worked that in with the pig story.